Saturday, September 26, 2015

Ripping a Hook Outta Paul

I guided people for over two decades and we handled fish and hooks - lots of them.  In all those years, not a single one of my guests was ever hooked.  We had a couple of "close ones" but luckily never had a barb go below the surface of the skin.  

That being said, I have now ripped the hooks our of quite a few people in recent years.  One time, Pete Edwards came in with a hook buried in his thumb.  Pete wanted it removed and wondered if I could help.  I proceeded to snip the two points off of the treble hook which were not stuck in Pete using my bicycle spoke cutters.  My cutters were back from my bike shop days and I kept all my bike tools - just in case I decide we need to go back into selling bikes.  These spoke cutters would snip through 12 gauge, stainless steel spokes with ease and they work really well on hardened fish hooks.

So, the first step is to carefully snip any potentially threatening hooks along with the lure so we only have the remaining hook stuck in Pete's thumb. I know from experience, that a finger/thumb injury hurts all the way up to one's neck, so I carefully removed the points trying to not wiggle the main hook.  Pete was understandably wincing.


After I isolated the hook to just the part stuck in his finger, I found some 50 lb. test fishing line and a screwdriver.  I put one loop around the base of the hook where it was sticking out of Pete and took the two ends and tied them around the screwdriver handle to fashion a MacGuyver-esque starter cord like you would find on a lawn mower.  With the ripcord handle in my left hand and my right hand thumb in position, I told the "braced" Pete, that I would push down on the eye of the hook and rip at the same time to cause the hook to roll out in one swift motion.  This maneuver allows the hook to open the skin and give a place for the barb to go that is not catching on skin.  It rolls out in a quick flash of pain that ends usually pretty quickly with very minimal damage.  It sounds terrible, but it does work.

Pete was going to be the first person I've ever done this to, ever....

I was ready, Pete closed his eyes and braced his aggravated thumb solidly on the counter right next to the cash register.   I said, "On three.  One, Two, RIP!"

The hook flew out of the thumb and pinged off the ceiling and walls at least three times.  Pete roared in agony, "Jesus, Jumpin' Jehosphat! Oh MY GOD tell me it came out because that hurt like HELLL!" to which I quickly replied "Oh sorry, Pete - we're gonna have to try it again. It didn't work!"

Pete groaned like a dying lion at the thought of attempting it again and I  quickly added that I was just kidding.  It came out just fine.  He opened his eyes, smiled and said "Whew!".  We both had a laugh and Pete back out fishing.

Well, this is his brother Paul:






I'm really getting my technique down.  LOL!





Sometimes I Get a Chance to Go Fishing

I don't like to leave too often during our season because invariably, somebody needs something or something breaks when I'm gone - at least it feels that way.  But, I do like to sneak away to Wood Lake every now and then.  Here I am with my friend Paul from about 10 days ago.  


It was a good day of fishing.

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Put down your iPhone and Drive Straight Ahead

Well, it's been a moderate summer but there is an endless supply of things to keep one really busy at a resort.  When something doesn't need a repair, someone has a question, or needs help or is lost.  The "lost" ones always fascinate me.

In today's world, so many are completely addicted to their iPhones and the like that they can't do even the simplest task without them.   In my opinion, that is a really compromised way to be, but nobody's listening to me as they line up for blocks to buy a new iPhone when their old iPhone (which was new last month) was perfectly good from an operational standpoint.  I live in the woods.  I can't figure out the obsession/addiction.  However, I can see what it does to people's ability to think and navigate and it ain't good.

Since iPhones really made their way into the America psyche, we experience at least 20 lost souls per year who, despite having the ability to read our instructions to find us, toss those to the wind and wing it with their smart phones.  This inevitably takes them to Winton MN which is just three miles out of Ely on the way to us and their phone then tells them that they have landed at Red Rock/Northwind Lodge.   They usually end up at Brandau Plumbing in Winton or the driveway of Veteran's on the Lake which is a veteran's retreat.  Then they call us up (because they still have cell coverage) with mild panic and irritation in their voices. It says right in our website how to literally drive your car pebble by pebble in the road to Northwind Lodge/Red Rock but that holds no meaning for many. Knowing this, I instruct them on the phone how to get to us from Winton, Minnesota.  


It goes like this:

Me: Are you ready?


The Lost:  Yes

Me: Take your phone and go outside the car.

The Lost:
 OK

Me: With your left hand, place your phone on the ground, approximately 1 foot in front of the driver's side tire on your car.

The Lost:  Errr..OK

Me:
 Now get in your car and drive ahead one foot.  Go get a real paper map.

At this point, there is usually laughter from giggles to guffaws OR the occasional snort of derision on the other end.  I then assure them that they are to continue forward on that same road for 12.1 miles and they'll hit our driveway RIGHT across from the Ojibway Lake Public Access.  At times, even this doesn't work and they shoot right past ending up at Lake One, the "default" end of the road.  They then turn around and find us on the way back.

 Many times, they walk in TOTALLY confused as to the fact that our location is wrong in Google or on their Tom-Tom and tell me all about it.  I know.  I've tried for years to change it and I've just given up.  Computers and the internet are not as smart as everyone gives them credit.  In fact, your smart phone is dumber than a bag of hammers, so don't rely on it so heavily.  We're living proof that it can be completely wrong and very unreliable.

Now, I, too, have been lost in big cities and had to re-trace my steps but that was back in the day when we took notes and looked at a map.  Well, actually I still use maps.  Being lost is aggravating and unnerving when you end up in a bad neighborhood, so I understand it well.  The part I don't understand is that the Fernberg road is a dead-end road that terminates at Lake One which is a Boundary Waters Canoe Area entry point.  You can't get lost looking for businesses which are right on this road, right?   There is no where else to go, right?

Sigh...

Here's our website's instructions on how to get to find us:  Click Here  It has worked well this summer with many positive comments.  I prefer "blunt".